5 Months In

It feels like a long time since I posted!  There are a lot of things that I've missed!

One of the main events was a visit from my family!  Mom Mom and Grandpa and Auntie Rebecca all came up for a weekend at the end of October.  I wrote them an email, formally inviting them.  We are going to see them for Thanksgiving, but even by then she will have grown and changed so much.  I'm glad they got to see her... this was only the second time since she was born!  Cordelia had a blast and they all had a great time making her laugh and be silly and getting covered in drool.  My parents really liked getting to see Cordelia playing with the baby toys that had once been mine.  My mom had saved all these neat Johnson and Johnson developmental toys from the 1980s and some of them a really great and so engaging.

My mom and Rebecca cooked up some delicious soup and also a huge pan of roasted vegetables, all with farmer's market ingredients.  We had left overs for almost the whole week--- awesome! We also went out to breakfast at the Original Pancake house, which was incredibly delicious as always.

I have been having continuing duct issues, no fun.  TMI, beware.... Things were clearly backing up from a little white dot on the nipple, so this time I poked it with a sterilized needle, basically the only thing from the internet I hadn't tried.  That worked to get things flowing again at least.  And it didn't hurt either, which is what I was worried about.  But things didn't completely clear up, so around Halloween I decided to just take the stupid antibiotics I got from my doctor's visit.  I did pretty well trying to remember to take 4 pills a day, but there were still at least two days I was short on.  Today is my last day of them and I haven't had a plugged duct the whole time I've been on them.  Connection??????  So did they clear up some infection or am I simply having a good streak?  I have no. f-ing. clue.  We'll see what happens this next week now that I'll have finished them.  I still have that white dot... it is practically painless unless I put a lot of pressure on it, and milk is able to flow through.  So I'm going to leave it alone; just trying to put lanolin on it regularly.

For Halloween, Cordelia tried on various costumes, but her final choice was the Very Hungry Caterpillar.  We got a knit hat from Etsy... super cute.  She wore her green tutu that Stephanie made her.  She looked sooo adorable.  We did not trick or treat, maybe next year!!

As I mentioned above, drool.  Cordelia has been drooling like mad.  We think she is trying to cut some bottom teeth.  Sometimes we put a bib on her, she just gets so soggy.  Or she will need outfit changes because of the wetness.  She has been waking up in the night fussing too.  I had been thinking it's her teeth, but now I am starting to think it is just waking and not knowing how to go back to sleep.  So, about two weeks ago, we have started cosleeping.  She will start the night in her bed, but when she wakes up I will just put her between us for snuggles and so that she can nom on our of our fingers for relief.  The benefit is that I don't have to get all the way up to feed her-- most of the time she can go back to sleep after her first waking.  If she wakes a second time I usually will have to feed her.  If I try and put her back in her bed after sleeping with up, she always wake up almost immediately after or during the transfer.  After a night feeding, I usually try to put her back in her bed and she can sleep there a little while.

Cosleeeping is frowned upon for various reasons... You could squish your baby, blankets could suffocate her, not firm enough mattress, inreased SIDS risk, lots of warnings.  But in the middle of the night, when you have to get up for work in a matter of hours, snuggling down with your warm little baby in bed so you all can get some sleep.... you just end up doing it and you know why everyone else has done it too.  When she's bigger she can learn to put herself to sleep and work on sleeping through the night.

I also was very upset on Friday, due to the dreaded comparing of babies.  I was talking with some other moms about Cordelia's waking and admitted to being on the computer or sometimes watching TV while up in the night.  (ok I don't usually watch tv, but definitely I'm on the laptop because other wise I'm bored).  The other moms where like, wait, how old is she, 5 months?!  Just feed her for like 10-15 mins, don't turn on any lights and then go back to sleep!  This made me feel bad.  Cordelia usually nurses for 30-50 minutes at night.  They said she was comfort nursing.  They meant it in a nice way, like I should be getting some more sleep.  But instead I felt sad, like I'm doing something wrong.  But I know every baby is different and you have to do what works for you (see cosleeping!).  I thought about it some more and I think Cordelia always nurses for at least 30 minutes.  She is not a fast eater.  And maybe she is comfort nursing.  How can I deny her, when I will be away from her all day?  I talked with my mom and she said that we would still eat that long at 5 months and reminded me she won't be doing this for forever.